Oh Boy. I had it all, the money, the friends, the looks, the cars. On the outside, everything was picture perfect, but on the inside, I was insecure, confused, and doubting everyone -including myself. I had no career path, no major accomplishments, and no college degree. I couldn’t maintain a successful relationship if Cosmo, the solar system, and six sex therapists co-operatively coached me daily. I was in a pillow fight with fate, and it was kicking my ass.
Is there a name for the hours you spend weekly, debating if your parents were right, you should have just majored in business? Would the job opportunities have been endless? A name for every minute you spend brushing your teeth, praying Craigslist would miraculously create a high paying, no experience needed listing.
I was sick of waking up, hoping I was someone different. Someone smarter, someone who made better decisions, someone with real confidence. Perhaps I was afraid of heading in the right direction, since I had been so triumphant in having no direction at all. I just didn’t want to be stuck, because in this day and time, you don’t get stuck, you be stuck.
They say when life hands you lemons, make lemonade. I bought every kind from store brand, to overpriced organic produce. Let’s just say I made the lemonade, drank it, and decided it was way too bitter. So like most mature adults, I followed through with the one rational idea my misplaced mind could create. I ran. I ran as fast, and as far as I could. Somehow, I ended up right here, 6102 miles away, questioning, who the hell drinks lemonade anyway?